Why stress about it?
Yeah. 2020.
I was all set to rant and rave about the 3-7 University of Tennessee Volunteers getting into a bowl game while Army was left out of a bowl after the Independence Bowl decided to cancel this year’s game.
Army!
Not just “Army!” but 9-2 Army.
I knew I might rub some noses the wrong way, might even “get in trouble,” but c’mon.
Then 2020 and COVID-19 decided I needed to scrap my original column and start over because the Vols have to pull out of the Liberty Bowl and Army has accepted the replacement team gig.
“Let’s make him do his column over … On deadline day,” 2020 said.
“Oh goody, I just love messing with people’s schedules,” COVID-19 said. “I like stressing out people, too. Actually, stressing out people is even more fun — when I’m not making them sick — so this is a two-for-one deal for me.”
It’s not that I’m really interested in the bowl season this year anyway. But if 3-7 Tennessee can get a bowl bid, why not 2-6 Illinois?
Yeah. 2020.
All year everyone I know has been worried about how 2020 will go out. With a whimper or a bang? I decided not to worry about it about six months ago. What’s going to happen is going to happen, so why stress about it for half a year?
But then our state decided it would lead the nation in one (or a couple) of the COVID-19 categories — and not in a good way.
“I hate it when people take me for granted and ignore me,” 2020 said. “Hey COVID-19, help me out here.”
“Oh goody, I just love messing with people’s attitudes,” COVID-19 said. “I like stressing out people, too. Actually, stressing out people is even more fun — when I’m not making them sick — so this is a two-for-one deal for me.”
Yeah. 2020
I never thought I’d see the day when I was actually afraid to visit my family.
I mean, I know sometimes my brothers and I do things that make us feel afraid afterwards. Nothing says fun like a pile of brush, a can of gasoline, a match, and an adult beverage or two.
But to actually be afraid to visit each other over Christmas is a little … Odd.
We’re family. We’ve gone through things together. We’re thick as thieves. We’re brothers, for goodness sakes.
Okay, we’re a little odd sometimes.
But we surely do love each other and we’ll miss seeing each other.
Let’s see, Ron has the brush pile. John has the gasoline. Joe has the matches. I’m supposed to bring the adult beverages — I hope Geritol counts.
But, nah. Let’s not. But better safe than sorry. None of us are spring chickens anymore.
“I hate it when people celebrate anything,” 2020 said. “Glad I could ruin that.”
“Oh goody, I just love messing with people’s celebrations,” COVID-19 said. “I like stressing out people, too. Actually, stressing out people is even more fun — when I’m not making them sick — so this is a two-for-one deal for me.”
Yeah. 2020.
I wish each and every one of you a very Merry Christmas.
I am an optimist by nature. I always see the silver lining, the light at the end of the tunnel. I never give up hope.
That has been stretched a bit this year, but not broken. Know this: None of us is in this alone. We are, truly, in this together.
So, look out for each other. Look out for yourselves. And remember, things always get better.
“I hate optimists,” 2020 said. “Wish I could get to this clown.”
“Oh goody, I just love messing with optimists,” COVID-19 said. “I like stressing out people, too. Actually, stressing out people is even more fun — when I’m not making them sick — so this is … What? Did you say, ‘Optimist?’ How’d that get by me?”
